I just about 18 years old – he may have been 19 or so. Our college was small and everyone knew everyone. As a transfer student, I was new to the culture of this college. There were unspoken rules, traditions and behaviors that were unique to this campus. I later learned it was common for the guys to seek out ‘fresh meat’ among the incoming freshmen and transfers. At that season in my life, I wasn’t looking for love. My heart was still tied up with my high school crush in some ways. Chapters were left unfinished – opening my heart was risky business. Truth be told, the memories of what was or wasn’t was like bitter-sweet pain then. On top of that, I missed my best male friend [who I left back home in my home town]. We enjoyed lazy days together and could talk about everything and nothing. All I wanted was someone to replace him while away at college. Then he came along. Sweet and seemingly innocent.
He was every girl’s best friend next-door. We quickly connected as he was easy to talk to. There was no romantic shenanigan; just two young hearts getting to know each other without a care in the world. I told him about my high school crush; he told me about whoever was the object of his affection at that moment. We took long walks exploring the new town we were in and did a lot of window shopping. He was comfortable to talk to and being with him felt safe. It didn’t take long for me to realize he was falling for me. I was upset, disappointed and annoyed at the same time. Didn’t I tell him all I wanted was a friend?
Well, for whatever reason – I decided to take a chance on young love. Admittedly, he loved me in many ‘100 ways’. I felt I did too in my own selfish way. It lasted through college and a few years beyond. We discovered a lot about each other and ourselves as individuals. We were admired by many and I began to feel he was my person. Now, looking back sometimes I think this relationship was a ‘teacher’ in many ways. It taught me many valuable lessons. Maybe that’s all it was meant to be. I migrated after a few years and sad to say, we didn’t survive the long distance among other things. In retrospect, no regrets. I’m glad I took the chance- risked it and let him in.
Today, both my high school crush and my college ex are good pals of mine. We created some beautiful memories [and not so nice ones] along the way. Love can be messy, but it’s worth taking the risk. In another lifetime I’d do it again, this time I’d take way more pictures! There’s something to be said about young crazy love – as the years roll by it brings smiles and laughter at the most unexpected times.
So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love. ‘ 1 Cor 13 :13]
Restored Hearts 