Dear Mama

I am a daughter, not a son. However, over the years I have heard the stories of many men and boys who have been parented by scarred, flawed women. The struggle has been real. In Girl Like Me, I mentioned that, ‘many times girls like me who haven’t traveled the road of restoration in a healthy, godly way sometimes leave a trail of hurt and pain behind us. ‘ Many mamas carry baggage that they unload on their children. Many sons have never been told who their fathers are or they may have been lied to. For many men this is an unbearable pain that could be soothed by just a simple honest conversation.

‘They grow into men and you pray you did right by them.’

Dear Mama,

This is very difficult for me, but I need you to hear the cry of my heart. I want you to know that I love you and nothing will ever change my love for you. I know it has not always been easy for you. I sense somethings are very hard for you to talk about. Some stories you’d rather forget – some questions you’d rather not answer. You may have made choices in the past that you regret. That regret seem to have pierced a hole in you – a wound that has not been healed. You have been wearing a cloak of shame for a while. You seem to wear it as an accessory. Maybe it feels comfortable. I get it.

I sense it’s hard to tell me some things. Maybe you think I wouldn’t understand or I would love you less. Be comforted with the knowledge that my love for you is unconditional. I often look at the creases on your brow and jaw lines; I see you have weathered some storms. You have bounced back from some, but I see some have left you bent over in spirit. I hear your sighs and I know in the darkness of your own space you have shed many tears. You share many of your’ lessons learned’ and I can taste your cynicism many times. I have learned to listen to what you are not saying. I understand that your own internal struggles may have limited your ability to see outside of yourself. For a minute, I would love you to see me and my pain.

I don’t ask for much. I just ask for the truth. Not a twisted version of what you would like it to be. I’m bleeding here and I need your help. I don’t blame you for the things I wrestle with. Facing my own inner conflicts has led me to this place where I recognize there’s a need to revisit parts of my story. You are part of my story. That part that I cannot extricate myself from. You were there when I was first kissed with the breath of life. You cocooned me for nine months – we ate from the same table. You were my first love. I now need you to help me ‘breathe’ as I am suffocating under this tangled mess in my heart and mind. Talk to me mama – tell me the truth.

I know there are some things you cannot give me. Only God can heal the broken me and I am trusting Him for that. I also know there are somethings that God won’t do because He has graced us with the ability to do them. He expects us to make corrections – to undo some wrongs when necessary. He promises to give us the strength to do so. Mama, can you receive that strength today? Mama, help me help those who love me. I can’t bleed on them too.

‘ Your Broken Son’

***Thanks for reading. Share with a broken mama- a broken son. ‘Like’ and comment.

Published by Restored Heart

An educator, author, a mom, friend, and a girl who loves that Her heavenly Father loves doing life with her. Passionate about introducing others to the Christ who heals hearts among other things....

11 thoughts on “Dear Mama

  1. This is a beautiful post, and as a man… it’s filled with truth. I pray for the moms out there also, that God will empower them and enable them to raise strong men of God without fear of explaining their past.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. The work is full of broken bleeding men, men wounded from conception. They are unable to Mai rain a relationship much less a marriage because they are still angry at Mama. The woman they love the most, as they grow older they are hurt by the revelation of their younger Mum. Will the love change? Of course not, have that conversation no matter how painful. You’d be amazing how light you feel after.
    A friend of mind was raped and gave birth to a son, her sister adopted him, she lived with this shame for years until her sister died. She sat her son down and revealed the family’s hidden secret. Today her son treats her like a Queen. The boy loves his Mum, and doesn’t hesitate to show her. Ask God to tell you what to say at the right time.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I have two sons and this really touched me. Although my children have had both of their parents in their lives, I can relate because I was raised by my grandparents. I knew both of my parents but I had alot of questions and issues with rejection as a result of what I experienced as a child. I’ve had to be very intentional about not allowing my past and pain to interfere with how I parent my children. I pray that God will help us as mothers to parent from our healing and not our heart.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Wow, that was so deep and true! Pray all those who are broken can find their release soon by seeing each other thro the lens of openness and forgiveness!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: