Recently in conversation, a friend of mine commented that the he has never truly ‘loved’ anyone apart from his mother and his kids. He’s almost 60 and has been in a few long term romantic relationships. I asked what those relationships were about. He said they were nice people and he didn’t want to be alone at those times. As a single woman, it frightens me that someone would commit to ‘be with me’ simply because they didn’t want to alone or I was a nice girl. Maybe I am this hopeless romantic who still believes in the love that makes me warm and safe on the inside.
It frightens me to think that someone would ‘settle’ with me because I was the comfortable choice. I glance around and wonder how many couples have chosen to bear with each other just because the transaction they made was convenient at the moment. Maybe I have it all wrong. What is/was your ‘why’? Why did you take the plunge to commit to share your space with your ‘plus one’?
I have often been asked about why I am single. Truthfully. I am yet to meet the one who I can’t imagine life without. I want more than comfortable. More than a transaction. There has got to be more than the benefits of a double income household. Call me the fool but there has to be more than the checking of a few boxes. I want that which causes us to weather severe storms and find us still standing. I want that safe place that allows me to bare my soul without being ashamed or afraid. When the world is unkind – I want that thing that I can count on. So call me hopeless or unrealistic – I want nothing less. In this harsh, unforgiving world, I believe God gifted us with that beautiful thing called love. At it’s best, I imagine that it is an overflow of His love in our hearts.
So while I wait – I rest in the love of my heavenly Father. I choose to give Him my heart and allow Him to lead accordingly. I believe one of life’s greatest injustices is to commit myself to ‘settling’ with less than while my heart bleeds for more.
“…..I found him whom my soul loves.” [ Songs of Solomon 3: 4b]
Restored Hearts 
I agree with you. I think there is a balance. Maybe there isn’t always a blazing fire when it comes to passion in a relationship. I think sometimes men’s needs in a partner are simpler. I’m sure it depends on the person. “I was lonely” shouldn’t be the predominant factor in choosing to enter into a lasting partnership.
LikeLiked by 1 person
For sure. The fire may not always be blazing, but there needs to be a spark somewhere sometime. Otherwise you are just like my brother!😊😃
LikeLiked by 1 person
A lady who knows exactly what she wants…ok, you go girl😊!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Only Jesus knows me better…😃
LikeLiked by 1 person
Absolutely, don’t settle for anything less! Let her still believe, and in the meantime, rest within The Father’s Love!
My wife and I, have been through many things, but still in love, still wanting to be together forever! For the past few years, she health has been difficult, and she’s mostly in bed, with me being her caregiver because of her stroke. Regardless, forever it will still be! Blessings to you!
LikeLiked by 1 person
You’re ‘what I’m talking about’… a love no less. God bless you both.👏👏💕
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙏🏽😊👍🏾
LikeLike
You are so wise to wait until there comes the man who makes your heart sing! He won’t be perfect, but you’ll know that together you can contribute to the world around you as a couple better than you could as individuals. He’ll support and encourage you; you’ll do the same for him.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Amen! I believe…
LikeLike